One Benefits from Modesty and Is Ruined by Complacence
 
There is an ancient Chinese saying, "One benefits from modesty and is ruined by complacence." Lao Zi said, "A man is able to tell right from wrong when he does not think of himself as a know-it-all. A man will be recognized for his achievements when he does not brag. A man is capable of great accomplishments if he is not arrogant."
 
A tolerant person is bound to have good fortune. An intolerant person is bound to have bad fortune. Being humble or being arrogant determines one's fortune. A humble man of lofty character will become increasingly moral. Hence, modesty is a virtue a moral person must maintain.
 
During the Spring and Autumn Period in ancient China (770 – 476 BC), Zilu, a disciple of Confucius, once asked Confucius, "Why does a degenerated person tend to be conceited?" Confucius replied, "At its origin in Wen Mountain, the Yangtze River is unable to even float a cup. But when the Yangtze River goes down to the next port, multiple boats can line up in a row on the river." Zilu asked again, "What do you mean, teacher?" Confucius explained, "The Yangtze River is a very long river (the longest river in China), but it is no more than a small brook at its origin. It becomes bigger and wider as it keeps receiving water from many different brooks and rivers. A man who thinks twice before he speaks does not boast or make empty promises. A man who thinks twice before he acts does not hug all the credit. A true gentleman is wise and kind. A true gentleman respects, tolerates and forgives others and is a man of his word. A degenerated man thinks little of virtue and that is the reason why he is not the man he appears to be on the outside and is conceited."
 
Yu the Great (2200 – 2101 BC), a virtuous king who founded the Xia Dynasty (2070 – 1600 BC), never boasted or acted proud. He used to say, "Everyone's merit is worth learning!" When offered advice, Yu often bowed to express his gratitude. In fact, Yu was very open to feedback. He was best remembered for successfully controlling the flooding of the Yellow River.
 
The Duke of Zhou was a man of extraordinary talents, charisma and accomplishments, but he was far from arrogant or narrow-minded. On the contrary, the Duke of Zhou treated talented people with courtesy and humbleness. He was worried that the government might miss out on talented men during the recruiting process. He followed the Mandate of Heaven, established the rites of Zhou and created Yayue (“elegant music”) of Chinese classical music.
 
Emperor Taizong (599 – 649 AD) of the Tang Dynasty was the most welcome of criticism out of all emperors. He achieved greatness by accepting criticism that others would find difficult to accept. He tried hard not to abuse his absolute power. He used to say, "A rational ruler becomes increasingly wise by reflecting upon his flaws, while an irrational ruler is forever foolish in hiding his flaws." Emperor Taizong not only humbly accepted feedback, but he encouraged criticism. He truly delighted in criticism. This was why capable chancellors speaking their minds abounded during his reign in the Zhenguan Era (627 – 649 AD) and his administration became one of the few honest and uncorrupted ones in history.
 
Virtuous rulers in Chinese history respected Heaven, complied with morality, acted humbly, respected others, restrained their conduct, and advocated kindness. They were role models of morality. Consequently, they were blessings to their subjects. But have they ever boasted of their morality? If virtuous kings were so modest, why shouldn't we learn from them?
 
Shi Chong (249 – 300 AD) and Wang Kai were two of the richest men of the Jin Dynasty (265 – 420 AD). They competed with each other in showing off their wealth in one of the most absurd acts in history. To show off his wealth, Wang Kai made a purple silk screen 12 miles long flanking the entryway to his house. Shi Chong topped him with a 16-mile long colorful satin screen. Next, Wang Kai showed off a coral fan one foot tall, an expensive gift from the emperor, at a banquet. While all the other guests were impressed by the size of the coral fan, Shi Chong smashed the coral fan with an iron back scratcher. He then presented many coral fans two to three feet tall and gave one to Wang Kai as compensation. Later on, Shi Chong's home was besieged by an usurper's army during unrest. Before he died, Shi Chong sighed and said, "You are killing me for my wealth!" Shi Chong didn't come to his senses until he was about to die. If only he had come to that realization sooner, he would not have been so arrogant. Showing off can lead one to a very cruel fate. With this lesson in mind, how can we not be prudent in our words and actions? Besides, wealth and talents are nothing to brag about. If a man brags or shows off his wealth or talent, he has lost his morality and shame even before disaster arrives.
 
Once a man becomes conceited, he will stop cultivating his morality. Complacency is an obstacle to improvement. Once a man starts showing off, he will stop improving his morality. Nothing is more meaningful than making humble and constant efforts to improve one's morality. A man will be able to shoulder important and grand responsibilities only if he perseveres in pursuing truth and a higher realm of morality. A man is able to teach others with kindness and disintegrate all degenerated elements only if he tolerates everyone and everything. There is another ancient Chinese saying, "Do not hug all the credit. He who does not hug credit will get all the credit. He who does not fight does not have any enemies."
 
谦受益　满招损
 
“谦受益，满招损”是中国传统的一句古训，意思是说，谦虚的人会受到益处，自满的人会招来损害。老子说：“不自以为是的人，才能够对事情判断分明；不自夸的人，他的功劳才会被肯定；不骄傲的人，才能够成就大事。”器量大的人，福泽也必定深厚；器量小的人，福泽也必定浅薄，而谦虚和骄傲，则是福祸的分际。品行高尚而虚怀若谷的人，他的道德就更显的光明，因此谦虚是君子始终保持的美德。
 
春秋时，子路问孔子：“为甚么小人总是自以为了不起呢？”孔子说：“在长江水从汶山刚刚流出来的时候，连一个杯子都无法漂起来；到了长江渡口的时候，船只可以并列航行。”子路问：“这是甚么意思？”孔子说：“长江是一条源远流长的大河，它的水势一开始并不大，后来因为逐渐的接纳众多的水流，才成为一条大河的。说话谨慎的人不会虚夸浮华，行为谨慎的人不会把功劳据为己有。君子既智慧又仁德，能够做到对人恭敬、待人宽厚、与人信实。而小人不讲重德，才表里不一且自以为了不起。”
 
例如上古的贤君大禹从不骄傲自夸，他说：“别人的长处都值得我学习啊！”每听到别人对他的善言相劝，常感激的下拜。他广泛听取别人的意见，成功的治理了黄河，功垂青史。周公才华盖世，不但不骄傲不吝啬，还非常谦恭的礼贤下士，唯恐天下的贤人没有得到任用。他循天道制定了礼乐制度。唐太宗是我国历史上最善于纳谏的君主，他说“明主思短而益善，暗主护短而永愚”，他不仅虚心纳谏，而且勇于求谏，真正做到了闻过则喜，从而使贞观时期形成了“直士盈朝，从善如流”的清明政治局面。历代的圣贤明君都敬天、敬德，心守谦虚而尊人约己，导人向善，为人们树立了道德的楷模，为百姓增添福祉。他们何曾以自己的道德向人矜夸呢？他们尚且能够如此的谦逊，人们为甚么不去学习、效法他们呢？
 
晋朝的石崇与王恺，两个人斗富，比谁更有钱。王恺做了紫丝步障长四十里，石崇就做了锦步障长五十里。王恺夸耀皇上赐给他的径尺珊瑚，石崇拿起铁如意就把珊瑚击碎，然后拿出家中的许多珊瑚，都是长达二、三尺高，以一株赔给了王恺。后来石崇因为犯罪，家破人亡的时候，叹气说道：“你们杀我的目的，不就是想要得到我的家产吗！”石崇到临死之前才醒悟，如果他能够早些知道的话，必定就不会自夸了。而骄傲自夸的灾祸，就是如此的残酷，所以一言一行，怎么可以不谨慎小心呢？而且富贵才能又有甚么足以为恃的呢？若是以此来骄人，姑且不谈他灾祸是否已至，首先就已经丧失了自己的心而不知羞耻了啊！
 
人一旦有自满高傲的心，就会障碍自己德行的提升。自满之后，便无法再增加；自夸之后，便无法再提高。只有谦逊、努力的在德行上提升才是最有意义的，只有坚定对真理的追求和不断升华思想境界才能担当起大任和重任，只有以宽广的胸怀包容一切，才能善化他人，令一切不正的因素解体。正如古语所说“功成而弗居。夫唯弗居，是以不去”、“夫唯不争，故天下莫能与之争”。