Suffering Insults Modestly and Attaching Importance to the Bigger Picture
2016-10-10


Suffering Insults Modestly and Attaching Importance to the Bigger Picture
 
Kou Xun, courtesy name Ziyi, was from Changping (now Beijing), Shanggu County in the Eastern Han dynasty (25 – 220 AD). He was a general who was highly trusted by Emperor Guangwu (5 BC – 57 AD) , and he was very well known in the government for his knowledge of classical scriptures and his high morality. Many people praised him as a person with high virtue and believed that he had the capacity to become a prime minister. He always remained modesty when he was confronted with insults and never argued with others for personal interests. He considered the bigger picture to be the most important.
 
Kou Xun was once the governor of Yingchuan County. At the time, there was a general Jia Fu, who was in charge of the guards of the emperor's palaces. When Jia Fu was in Runan City, he heard from someone that one of his staff committed murder in Yingchuan, and was arrested and executed by the local governor Kou Xun. Jia Fu was quite humiliated about this. When he passed by Yingchuan County on his return journey from Runan City, he said to his company, "Both Kou Xun and I are generals of the nation. As a great man, isn't it strange if I do not take my revenge when I am framed by someone? I will definitely kill Kou Xun when I see him this time."
 
Upon learning of this, Kou Xun refused to see him. Gu Chong, nephew and a member of Kou Xun's staff, said to him, "As a soldier I will serve at your side with my sword in hand. If something improper happens, I will be strong enough to handle it."
 
Kou Xun said, "This is not right. In the old times, Lin Xiangru was brave enough not to yield to the King of Qin, but he yielded to Lian Po for the good of his nation. There were clearheaded people like him even in a kingdom as small as Zhao. How can I forget it?" Then he ordered the officials of his subordinate counties to serve well Jia Fu and his followers, while he tried to avoid seeing him. In the end, the followers of Jia Fu were so drunk that they could not chase down Kou Xun. They gave up their plan to assassinate him and left Yingchuan County for home.
 
Later, Kou Xun dispatched someone to debrief Emperor Guangwu on what transpired in his county. The emperor then summoned Kou Xun to go see him. When Kou Xun arrived, he found Jia Fu already there. He attempted to evade Jia Fu, but the emperor said to him, "The situation of the country has not yet been settled. How can two generals fight each other for personal interests? Let me dispel the tension." The three sat together and talked freely. In the end, Kou Xun and Jia Fu left the emperor's home in the same carriage as good friends.
 
People who fail to take insults modestly will certainly nurture deeper hostilities and incur disaster, both to their undertakings and to themselves. History books commented on Kou Xun's attitude in different ways. Confucius said, "Bo Yi and Shu Qi do not dwell on previous hostilities. That is why they have very few personal enemies." This attitude can be found in Kou Xun.
 
Kou Xun's action was not out of cowardice or weakness. On the contrary, he had a broad mind and far insight, and that is why he was regarded as a person who can achieve great accomplishment and high morality. Because he was modest, he was able to resolve the hostilities between Jia Fu and himself in the end. They became friends after being enemies and finally supported the Eastern Han dynasty to unify China.
 
忍辱退让 大局为重
 
寇恂,字子翼,是东汉时上谷县昌平(今北京)人,是颇受光武帝倚重的将帅,他通晓经书,修养德行,在朝廷中很有名气,当时的人都称赞他是道德高尚的人,认为他有当宰相的才能。他遇事能够忍辱退让,不计私怨,处处以大局为重。
 
寇恂曾担任颖川太守。当时掌管宫外巡卫的将领叫贾复,他在汝南时,听说自己的一部将在颖川杀了人,结果被太守寇恂抓住并在闹市处死了。贾复为此感到很耻辱,在从汝南回来经过颖川时,对身边的人说:「我和寇恂同做将帅,但现在被他陷害,大丈夫哪有被人欺负了而不同他一决高低的?这次见到寇恂,我一定要杀了他。」
 
寇恂听说后,不想同他见面。谷崇说:「我谷崇是将领,可以带剑侍奉在旁边,如果突然有甚么变化,足可以抵挡。」
 
寇恂说:「不对。以前蔺相如不怕秦王,却反而屈服于廉颇,这是为了国家。小小的赵国,尚且有这样懂道理的人,我怎么可以忘记呢?」于是命令所属各县对贾复一干人好好侍奉,而他自己有意借故避让。最后贾复带的人都喝醉了,没有追上寇恂,只有过境离去。
 
寇恂派人将这里发生的事告诉了光武帝,光武帝于是召寇恂前去,寇恂去了后,发现贾复已经在那里了,于是再次想起身回避,光武帝对他说:「天下还没有安定,两虎怎么能私斗呢?今天我来和解。」于是三人一同入座,极尽言欢。最后寇恂和贾复乘一辆车出来,两人结为了好朋友才各自离去。
 
遇事如果不能忍辱退让,这必将导致结怨更深,直至招灾惹祸,误事害人。史书上对寇恂评论道:「孔子说:‘伯夷、叔齐,不记旧仇,所以仇人少。’在寇恂身上就可以看到这一点。」
 
寇恂的行为可不是懦弱无能,而是心胸博大,目光长远,是能成就大事、有德行之人的表现。因为他的退让,所以最后与贾复之间的仇恨得以化解,两人化敌为友,共辅东汉王朝一统中原。
    来源: 看中国 责编: Kitt

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